Wednesday, January 25, 2006
Resilience
You should see how things are unfolding for me right now. Or should I say, not unfolding?
I have had so few leads to any kind of work and the few that come along, that I create or pursue, end up being dead ends. I am hitting dead end after dead end after dead end. I am trying to be resilient and have faith that If I could see the bigger picture I would see that in a matter of moments I am going to turn a corner and walk straight into Something Wonderful. I am trying to have faith that the perfect job is unfolding for me as I type this...but 'trying to have faith' is about as good as having no faith at all.
What do I do? Oh, for someone to spring up out of the ground and give me the answers...to help me in some unforseen and angelic way. I am convinced that there must be an angle that I am not taking, something that I am missing...people say, brilliant resume, you must be overqualified for this position. Or, I can sense that you would be great in this position, but you don't have enough Education for us to make that decision. Or, I can use you, but I will pay you only a % of my increased revenue and if you don't produce, you starve. Or, here is a job, you will be doing my accounting, my reception, my administration, my marketing, my promotions, my customer service, my office management and my laundry...oh, and your starting wage will be a 'competitive' $12/hr! Perhaps I must come to terms with the fact that that is where I may need to start again. Meanwhile, I am feeding myself very little as to ration what little food we have -- oh, so, Angela's Ashes. I am succeeding so far at not allowing it to completely rule my mood and I DO feel like something has got to give at some point...but gawd this sucks.
Had that thought to start an Employment Ministry/Group/Thingy at the Centre. Seems a lot of people and not just me are looking for work or at least looking to upgrade their current work. That might be a good idea. Hmmmmmmm.
So, that is the word of the day, maybe the week. Resilence. I will not let this beat me. I will start making good money super soon and it will be fun and joyful and empowering.
I won't even let Mr. Harper's minority government make me blue.
I am going to go get something to eat.
I have had so few leads to any kind of work and the few that come along, that I create or pursue, end up being dead ends. I am hitting dead end after dead end after dead end. I am trying to be resilient and have faith that If I could see the bigger picture I would see that in a matter of moments I am going to turn a corner and walk straight into Something Wonderful. I am trying to have faith that the perfect job is unfolding for me as I type this...but 'trying to have faith' is about as good as having no faith at all.
What do I do? Oh, for someone to spring up out of the ground and give me the answers...to help me in some unforseen and angelic way. I am convinced that there must be an angle that I am not taking, something that I am missing...people say, brilliant resume, you must be overqualified for this position. Or, I can sense that you would be great in this position, but you don't have enough Education for us to make that decision. Or, I can use you, but I will pay you only a % of my increased revenue and if you don't produce, you starve. Or, here is a job, you will be doing my accounting, my reception, my administration, my marketing, my promotions, my customer service, my office management and my laundry...oh, and your starting wage will be a 'competitive' $12/hr! Perhaps I must come to terms with the fact that that is where I may need to start again. Meanwhile, I am feeding myself very little as to ration what little food we have -- oh, so, Angela's Ashes. I am succeeding so far at not allowing it to completely rule my mood and I DO feel like something has got to give at some point...but gawd this sucks.
Had that thought to start an Employment Ministry/Group/Thingy at the Centre. Seems a lot of people and not just me are looking for work or at least looking to upgrade their current work. That might be a good idea. Hmmmmmmm.
So, that is the word of the day, maybe the week. Resilence. I will not let this beat me. I will start making good money super soon and it will be fun and joyful and empowering.
I won't even let Mr. Harper's minority government make me blue.
I am going to go get something to eat.
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