Monday

I don't even have it in me to give my blog an interesting title. Another week. I feel darkness creeping in. Someone save me.

I just received a cool email from someone who stumbled across my webiste/blog by fluke and then mentioned me in HER blog...check out my cool review...

CLICK HERE TO SEE IT

You'll have to scroll down a bit in her blog to get to my mention. This may seem small to you, but I am grasping at any little piece of affirmation that I can find. Small blessings go a looong way. Thanks, Celeste.

Jordan told me last night that I don't communicate what I am going through very often to him. I see where he is coming from, but I am just not sure how healthy it is to say the same things over and over and over again. I have tried this year to protect my blog from becoming the same regurgitation of my fears, my lonliness, my frustration at feeling like I am not finding any answers, my panic at my growing debt. I know i must acknowledge that that isn't pretty, but If i steep in this yuckiness I may never end this cycle. Not sure how I can invite my partner into this without either drowning him or drowning myself.

At least I voted today. And I found my lost credit card. And I am eating really yummy, really hot soup right now while it rains and rains outside my window. And, despite its ups and downs, I love my partnership and I love my Jordan. So much. Life is good, something will give very soon. This week will change my life.

Etcetera, etcetera.