Friday, January 14, 2005
Organic Princess
I feel like i am living a double life. Perhaps i am just in a whole lotta balance.
One moment i am wearing my thrift store clothes and hiking boots, walking to the grocery store to lower fuel emissions, buying sprouts and spinach and soymilk and organic brown rice and then shoving as many items into one bag as possible to save our landfills from plastic that does not biodegrade. The next i am wearing my new hot pink sweater and MAC lipgloss, standing in an elevator of my corporate office building with a Starbucks Soy Chai Latte in one hand, two dozen Tim Horton's donuts in the other and a Marie Clare magazine tucked under my arm that promises to tell me the latest hair styles and sex secrets. Some of my life is spent in a quiet apartment with Tibetan chimes playing while i journal and sip herbal tea beside a candle and some of my life is spent in a TexMex restaurant on a cheap burgers and beers night making lude comments and posing for gratuitous cleavage shots while appreciative men gawk.
I am torn between wondering which is the mask and which is my authentic self........when it hits me:
What if it is all pieces of me? What if i don't have to decide? What if the beauty of my life is that i hang out in limbo dipping my toe into as many different worlds as possible knowing that they are all as 'right' or 'wrong' as i decide them to be? What if all that matters is being kind to yourself and serving the world with that inner joy?
What if i can be the first Corporate Organic Princess?
The first Artistic Yuppie Bohemian?
One moment i am wearing my thrift store clothes and hiking boots, walking to the grocery store to lower fuel emissions, buying sprouts and spinach and soymilk and organic brown rice and then shoving as many items into one bag as possible to save our landfills from plastic that does not biodegrade. The next i am wearing my new hot pink sweater and MAC lipgloss, standing in an elevator of my corporate office building with a Starbucks Soy Chai Latte in one hand, two dozen Tim Horton's donuts in the other and a Marie Clare magazine tucked under my arm that promises to tell me the latest hair styles and sex secrets. Some of my life is spent in a quiet apartment with Tibetan chimes playing while i journal and sip herbal tea beside a candle and some of my life is spent in a TexMex restaurant on a cheap burgers and beers night making lude comments and posing for gratuitous cleavage shots while appreciative men gawk.
I am torn between wondering which is the mask and which is my authentic self........when it hits me:
What if it is all pieces of me? What if i don't have to decide? What if the beauty of my life is that i hang out in limbo dipping my toe into as many different worlds as possible knowing that they are all as 'right' or 'wrong' as i decide them to be? What if all that matters is being kind to yourself and serving the world with that inner joy?
What if i can be the first Corporate Organic Princess?
The first Artistic Yuppie Bohemian?
« Blog Home