This time last year, I was fending for myself in San Diego. Having been left there by my husband who grabbed an opportunity to fly to Mexico for a week of sun and fun, I had no other choice but to make my own holiday celebrations with just me and myself. The thing was, other than the 25th, which was kinda depressing indeed, the rest of the time, I enjoyed myself. I browsed consignment stores for hours on end, tried out a funky yoga studio near our vacation rental, sought out an amazing Shiatsu massage, walked around neighbourhoods close to where we were staying and took in the lights...it was lovely.
Lovely, but lonely. And a bit weird. Leon's flying off to Mexico was not his finest Husband Of The Year moment, and even though San Diego treated me well, being in a hot, US city for Christmas was kinda odd. When I think back to that time, it is hard to not wonder if how I spent that holiday didn't have something to do with how disjointed and difficult the following year ended up being. I mean, 2011 has brought me numerous gifts, but mostly, it was a tough year. Deciding to stay in Saskatchewan, only to struggle finding a place to buy, the pregnancy scare which resulted in much heartache and a cascade of fighting with Leon about our future, the loss of two of my most major contracts, living out of my car for waaaay too many months, multiple months apart from my husband, taking gigs I disliked to pay the bills, more fighting with Leon about our future...yeah, it has been tough.
But through the tough comes the wonderful. Of course. New friends, finances healthy despite cancelled shows, bravery to do things I wouldn't have otherwise done, the fittest/healthiest body I've had in my adult life, a marriage strong enough to survive a little bit of future uncertainty, and a very lovely 2011 Christmas season. This year I am not in San Diego, all alone. I am in my house, my nest, surrounded by the people I love, with scarves & gifts & a very pretty Christmas tree. It seems that this is how Christmas should be, and perhaps it foretells that my 2012 will get me back on track. I certainly hope so.
I plan on doing a blog post on my intentions for the coming year. But right now, I just wanted to spend a little time being grateful that I made it through the past 12 months, and that, as grand as it is, I am not in California, but in Canada.
4 comments:
You might want to read over your own words and blog post of Dec 19, 2010 and remind yourself how Leon ended up going to Mexico. You are so self-absorbed you can't even be honest with yourself about the truth of your life. Give yourself and the rest of the world a gift and get yourself some counselling. You have classic symptoms of several personality disorders. People who support your delusions are doing you a disservice. You need professional help.
Come on, Truth. Them's fightin' words. You obviously don't like me, but still, however, read my blog. Interesting. What is even more interesting is that, even though you call yourself Truth, and feel pretty certain that I am mentally ill, you aren't man (or woman) enough to identify yourself. If you're gonna be mean, live out loud and be proud of your hurtful opinions.
I dare you to reply with your real name. Because you may just be right about me, but everyone can agree that no one respects someone who is cruel or sanctimonious ANONYMOUSLY.
whoah....I love reading Krista's blog and this just makes it all the more interesting that someone chooses to post such hostile comments. Thanks for adding spice, whoever you are! Hope someone gives you a hug today. : ) Professional help is something that sounds like it should be within reach for (ahem) a few of us.
Well, I am not quite sure what to say. I am kind of touched that 'truth' stuck up for me, and also a little confused. I did choose to spend last year's Christmas time away from my wife, and that no matter what the rational, allowed, justified reason, it still made her sad. Some times it is important to acknowledge how someone's choices affect you, not in a "I am going to guilt you" kind of way, but in a "I miss you when you're not here" way. I love KJ very much, I think she is the best thing since green smoothies! There have been times when I think KJ has not been 'Wife of the year' either, but the truth is her personality suits me just fine. It just seems silly and a bit of an overreaction. Are you wanting KJ to feel another way? Better? Worse? Are you wanting KJ to acknowledge her past year as being kick ass? Horrible? To me the confusion lies in the "delusions" part of your quote, should I be concerned that she is deluding herself with visions of hope for the New Year!? If this is the case, I will of course heed your advice, and keep a close eye on all that positive thinking. : )
Post a Comment